This is a common question married couples often ask themselves; if they are ready to start a family.
My husband and I was married to my for a few years before we decided. I had recently graduated college and I was in prime of my career. Because I didn’t have children, I had the flexibility to travel and work longer hours. I was young and ambitious or you can call it career hungry.
We were still living together with my in laws. His elders were now starting to wonder if I was capable of having children. Thought we have made the decision not to have children, no one cared to understand but made their own assumptions.
So how did we know we were ready for a baby?
To be honest, people will argue that nobody is ever “really ready” for parenthood. After 5 years and two children, I still learn every day from my children and other mothers around me.
These are my five signs that I knew we were ready for a baby:
1. You’re willing to make Sacrifices
Are you ready to sacrifice what’s needed to care for this little bundle of joy. No one ever tells you how much sacrifice as a parent and especially as a mother. The lack of sleep, your exhausted body, your career, and mindset. For example my boobs are deflated from breastfeeding. For over two years, my nipples belonged to my boys. When ever I was around the boys, they nursed. My body was pulled in so many directions, I was constantly exhausted. No matter how much weight it lost this muffin top is forever. My skin hangs and forms a smiley face on my belly button. High rise/body shaper underwear and pants are still a must!
2. You’re Ready to Love Another
Every relationship is different, some are stronger than others. No matter your relationship level, are you ready to love another human being other than your spouse and yourself. Believe me, you will fall in love with your baby. It will become your priority.
3. You have a Support System
As I mentioned early, family was starting to question if we were able to have child. I knew this question would come because cultural having children young was expected. But little did I know they were my support system. My mother-in-law was my daycare; she could have worked but wanted to spend time with her grandchildren. When we needed a babysitter for date night or no reasons at all my kids had somewhere to go, I knew they would be love and taken care of.
4. Financial Stable
Babies are really, really expensive. Did you know that it can cost to half a million dollars to raise a baby? Or are you ready to give your gym membership or trade in your fancy sport car to a mini-van? I had a great a career and decent benefits while my husband was working two jobs. We knew it was going to be challenging financially but this wasn’t going to hold us back from having children. We were confident where we were financially.
5. Ready for a Social Change
Have you noticed you don’t want to go out anymore? Parties aren’t interesting and you just rather stay home. My husband and I didn’t want that life style anymore. We became home bodies, cooking at home tasted better than eating out and board games were more exciting. We were ready for a social change.
Whether you feel you are ready or not, just know that you are not alone. There are so many support groups via FaceBook or at your community. Reach out, ask questions and be open to change.
If you wait until you’re ready, ready. Well to be honest, then get comfortable waiting! I’m so glad I took the leap of faith, thought I wasn’t comfortable financially.